I'm Sorry For Being Creepy

Hi guys. I woke up today and my roommate told me that I probably have sleep apnea and that I also sleep with my eyes open. The things you learn. Here's what our conversation sounded like this morning.

"So...Madelaine", she began as I sleepily started to get dressed. "You kept making these gasping sounds in your sleep. You probably have sleep apnea."

"Uh...probably not..." I refuted. "I mean I'm sick. I can't even breathe out of my nose"

"No, like this was like gasping sounds like gasping for air. You do know what sleep apnea is, right? It's where people stop breeding in their sleep."

"Uhhhhh"

"OHMYGOSH. Sorry. BREATHING. NOT BREEDING" she exclaimed. "But seriously, I think I've heard you make these sounds before too". She went on to describe them as "gasping as if you suddenly sat up and remembered you had a paper due except you didn't sit up".

"Huh, that's funny" I said, sitting on the edge of my desk. "I mean my brother says that I sleep with my eyes open, so maybe I just have huge sleep problems. Not like I believe him or anything, because he's probably lying. Sometimes he claims that the reason he didn't say anything on the days I accidentally sleep in is because he could have sworn I was awake and that I looked at him as he walked across the hall. But that's ridiculous."

E started to look really nervous. "You were awake this morning, right? Like, before your alarm went off?"

I looked at her strangely. "Nope...fast asleep."

Her eyes got wider. "You were definitely looking at me. I thought you were awake. Oh my gosh, this is weird. So all those other times I thought you were awake in the morning YOU WEREN'T OH MYGOSH WHAT".

And that's how I figured out that I'm actually a really creepy person. Oh and guys? Sometimes I talk and mumble in my sleep too. Choir tour roommates/any other future roommates...I'm sorry. I really am. *cheesy grin* Heh.

But really, you know those CPAP mask things. THOSE ARE FOR SLEEP APNEA PEOPLE. And I've spent my entire life making fun of the name and calling them CRAP masks and what if I actually need to wear one and what am I going to do oh my gosh...

Or maybe I really am just sick and that's why I was gasping. Who knows.